Hit the road, Jack

I am not an expert at many tasks. My desk is in constant clutter, my fashion sense leaves much to be desired, and my ability to decorate cakes is on par with a 7-year-old. But traveling with children? Solo? For thousands of miles? For a month? I’ve got you covered, baby. Just call me the […]

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Magical, shmagical

I don’t know what it is about the last two decades in American parenthood but someone needs to raise the white flag and it might as well be me. Part of the problem might be the prominence of social media or the persistent need to document every single thing a child does but man it’s […]

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Top ten ways to be a miserable mother

I know. Quite the ironic title for a “Mother’s Day” post. Mother’s Day is about honoring the women in our lives who have mentored, guided, raised and loved us. I have many, many women whom, without them, I would be less intelligent, compassionate, kind, efficient and aware of my blessings. But while we are honoring […]

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How to Birthday

Once a year, we humans find a reason to celebrate the simple fact that we showed up. And we don’t just celebrate—we do it with a capital C, sprinkle it with a pound of hand-cut confetti and Instagram/Facebook it all up in yo’ face. When our oldest (hereafter called “Test Kid”) was little, I admit […]

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Who’s the teacher here?

Most days I forget how the world sees my daughter: a cute twelve-year-old who walks with a strange gait, who most-often is drooling and who uses a communication device to speak. I forget that she resembles a broken marionette that has snipped her strings and says so much with a smile. Yes, she is beautiful […]

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Trailer parks and tears

For much of my adolescent years I resided in a trailer park with a “Dallas” theme—the soap opera, not the state. We lived on J.R. Drive and the streets surrounding ours were: Knot’s Landing, Ewing Drive and Cattleman’s Circle. The south embraces themes, y’all. Seriously though, I would give anything to have been at the […]

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Cleaning house

One of the biggest complaints I hear from parents (right after sleep deprivation) is “How do you clean a house when tornadic children are constantly undoing all your work?” I confess that even now with our youngest being eight, at times our house looks like a frat. party just exploded and had a baby. I […]

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For the newbies

Sixteen years ago, I consulted friends, family, pregnancy books and child development classes to help me prepare me for my impending motherhood. All sources regretted to inform me of four important items which I will share with you now. Today. Because I’m a giver. First off, in the hospital if you deliver non-cesarean (Fine, I’ll […]

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Poor Baby

The world is heading down a dark tunnel fast, y’all.  I’m not talking about divorces, gambling or drugs. I’m not even talking about how we just launched a reality TV show entitled “US Government: Amateur Hour”. No, the real problem lies in baby names. Yes, baby names. The problem is two-fold. Problemo numero uno: There […]

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